Tag: fear

Interesting, You Can Fix That

Experts Discover Potentially Dangerous Problem Caused by Covid-19

 

Pictures of Covid19 cells
Electron micrographs of isolated 2019-nCoV particles (left), and in cells from human airways (right), marked with arrows.
THE NEW ENGLAND JOURNAL OF MEDICINE

Coronavirus is Killing Your Libido

A couple of weeks into the Coronavirus pandemic, I began to get calls from old and new clients with what was an expected problem. The stress, anxiety and uncertainty surrounding the disease and the loss of millions of jobs, stress of standing in lines and finding empty shelves where there was once essential items, and the orders to stay away from people and stay in your homes was really weighing on us.  Clients were having difficulty sleeping, they were overeating, and this forced vacation from school and work was quickly becoming old.

The experts were telling us to wash our hands, social distance ourselves, and to the extent possible maintain a sense of normalcy. Well, this new normal was clearly changing the way we interact with our spouses and partners. In our pre-pandemic lives, couples/partners would go about their typical routines of being out of the home and away from each other for eight to ten hours a day. Perhaps you would return and have a date night, or share dinner and recount your day, or perhaps you would share a 2 people kissing in streetconversation you had with a friend or colleague about something interesting. There would be a reconnecting between you and your partner. However, we now find ourselves looking for ways to create our own space within the confinement of our homes.

Slowly, and almost imperceptibly, many people began to feel closed in;  closed in by the space; closed in by the situation; closed in by their partner. And the impact of this constant bombardment of stress combined with the inability to find space is having its toll on how people feel.

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As I began to search more deeply into what they were saying and not saying, I was hearing things that began to raise red flags. I found that I was hearing a common theme starting to surface. Now before I get into what I was hearing, I want to share something that I also was seeing.

In an interesting marketing twist, the online porn sites such as PornHub and YouPorn began to advertise free service to help people through the stress of the pandemic. And while toilet paper was becoming a scarce resource, online retailers are seeing a serious surge in the sale sex toys. And these toys are not just for those who are isolated due to social distancing. No,  let’s put it on the line, sex feels good and it breaks up the boredom and routine. I will come back to the benefits in a bit. For now, let me leave that hanging there.

The red flags that my clients talked about outwardly dealt with their sleeplessness, anxiety, and fear. As we spoke more, they also shared that they were noticing that they weren’t feeling “IT”. They were feeling that their drive was on life-support. And when questioned further, both the men and women who were reaching out to me shared that they would find some personal space to slip away and masturbate. This too makes sense since it is “me time”, feels good, and relieves the boredom

Now, I am sure that like me, none of this is news or a surprise. Perhaps you find that I could well be describing the situation you are finding yourself in at the present. We know that libido is often the first victim of stress. The thing is that most people mistakenly equate libido to sex drive when it is truly much more than that. One of the most highly respected in the area of helping people overcome sexual issues through hypnosis is a woman in the U.K., Kaz Riley. Riley who is one of the most sought-after speakers and trainers in the world of hypnosis and the founder of Sexual Freedom Hypnosis , teaches therapists and clinicians how to improve the psycho-sexual functioning of consenting adults. Kaz’s definition of libido is far more comprehensive than simply sex-drive. According to Kaz, “ libido is a desire to connect. It is a sensual feeling and a desire to move forward. It is not just about having sex.”    This “life-force” as Riley calls it, is a primary driver that is there to help us succeed and achieve and to feel good.

The issue at hand (no pun intended), is that stress and anxiety become a loop which feed on themselves and create disruptions in our desire to share intimacy. It is well known that humans thrive with touch. For too many people who are shut-in away from others, they are failing to thrive. In fact, they are actually unintentionally harming themselves because they cannot engage in their normal routines of exercising, grooming and gaining the energy that we get from connecting with others and by overeating or eating the wrong foods, and masturbating to attempt to make themselves feel better.  I wrote the following in an earlier blog article: “We are, as humans, hardwired to seek connection. Study after study shows that people, especially, infants fail to thrive when they are deprived of human touch. Social touch is a powerful force in human development, shaping social reward, attachment, cognitive, communication, and emotional regulation from infancy and throughout life[i]. Yet, the social isolation, imposed loss of identity through job loss, unrelenting stress triggers, and continual uncertainty by politicians and fear mongers who continually move the “cheese” as we run through the maze, just exacerbates the deleterious effects on each of us.”

The death of our libido’s is serious. It is not just the loss of our sex drive; it is the loss of our feeling of intimacy and the long-term damage it is doing to us. And it isn’t going to be fixed with a little blue pill, or a new toy, or another video. No, right now, the only way that you are going to juice up your libido is by following these really important steps. Otherwise, you very well may find that it too is one of the casualties of the pandemic.

MOUTH TO MOUTH FOR YOUR LIBIDO

Reviving your drooping libido is going to take some elbow grease. You are going to have to take matters into your hands and really start a regimen of self-care. Start by losing the porn. PLEASE! I am not against porn. In fact, porn can be a great tool for spicing things up, if you remember that it is not real. I am, however, against using porn, or drugs or alcohol or food as an island of refuge from your pain, fear, and anxiety. That pain, fear, and anxiety that many are feeling is one of the biggest things you are facing. If you are struggling with the impact that any of these are having on your life, then reach out to me and see how hypnosis can help you break the cycle.

So, the first step to self-care is learning to become mindful. It means getting back to eating right, drinking plenty of water, taking time to practice mindfulness or other meditation. Mindfulness practice is not just about sitting quietly and clearing one’s mind. It is about learning to be present and focused in this moment. You can practice mindfulness when you are outside, socially distant from others, and walking. And as you walk mindfully, things begin to change. Perhaps, you become aware of the absence of airplane or car noises now. Maybe, you begin to notice the wonderful smells around and the colors of nature. I am amazed at how many people who tell me that they discover things that they have passed hundreds of times once they begin to do things mindfully.

One of the most amazing gifts of mindfulness is learning to eat mindfully. How much of the time do you eat a meal and before you know it, it is gone, and you have no idea what it tasted like. What if, you stopped and looked at your food? What if you smelled the smells and savored the tastes? What if instead of the usual bedroom routine of lips, t*ts and below the hips, you and your partner sensuously shared a piece of fruit or a glass of wine with the only goal being that of being able to experience this moment with them.  Imagine how much better you and your partner’s experience will be when you are both present and focused on each other.

Libido is about the journey, not the destination. Instead of becoming another victim of this pandemic, you have the most unique opportunity to spend time and put real effort into your relationship. It is not about achieving orgasm, though they feel great and release a host of endorphins and feel good hormones. Libido is far more than that. Now, maybe more than ever before, we need purposeful, loving, connection. The connection that comes from long hugs or sitting close to each other looking deeply into the windows of their being or with your hand on their hearts synchronizing your breathing and heartbeat. Now, more than ever before, we need to connect by shutting out the world, the noise and insanity, and allow the energy that attracted us to that other person to flow. And when you do that, when you mindfully engage in connecting and meet their needs, you will be amazed at how the desire to move forward and again be real with each other will break through.

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[i] Social touch and human development

Carissa J.Cascioac DavidMooreb FrancisMcGlonebd

https://doi.org/10.1016/j.dcn.2018.04.009

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Hypnotist, Author & Motivational Speaker, Marc Marshall

Marc Marshall is a certified clinical and stage hypnotist, medical hypnotist and certified mind-body specialist, author and motivational speaker at the New Jersey Hypnosis Center in Summit NJ.  He specializes in dealing with trauma, sexual trauma, pain, medical hypnosis and works with clients to empower and teach them how to improve their lives through hypnosis and mindfulness practice.  For more information or to schedule an appointment or interview, email info@hypnomarc.com or visit his website – www.hypnomarc.com

#hypnotherapy, @kazriley, @sexualfreedomhypnosis, #covid19, #Coronavirus, #pandemic, #anxiety, #NLP, #hypnosis, #marcmarshall, #quarantine, #hypnotherapy, #covid19, #coronavirus, #hypnosis, #masshypnosis, #fear, #stress, #anxiety, #obesity, #marcmarshall, #newjerseyhypnosis, #newjerseyhypnosiscenter, #njhypnosis, #hypnomarc, #health, #stress, #hypnotherapy, #hypnotize, #covid19hypnosis, #erotichypnosis, #sexualdysfunction, #libidio, #coupleshypnosis, #lossofsexdrive #relationships, newjerseyhypnosiscenter, #mindfulness, #summitnj, #westfieldnj, #sexpositive, #nofear, #sextherapy, #anorgasmia, #ed, #prematureejaculation, #vaginisumus, #performance, #performanceanxiety, #sex, #pleasure, #arousal, #porn, #pornaddiction, #masturbation #youporn, #pornhub, #sextoys #huffpo #refinery29 #buzzfeed #drresa #cosmo, #covid19update, #important covid19 information

Interesting

WHO ARE YOU?

STOP reading this Right Now!  And answer this question . . . WHO ARE YOU?   Say your answer out loud  and then just close your eyes for a few moments and feel what those words mean.   Where do you feel that in your body?  Is there a sound associated with that feeling?  Why are you that and not something else?

If you have ever been to one of my corporate motivational talks, or my group personal improvement sessions you will recognize this question as something that I often open with.  The first response that I frequently get often refers to the person’s job or role in society.  And there is  a very strong reason for this.  It is the reason when asked about their job that people will answer – I am a… doctor, baker, teacher, pizza delivery person.  We are defined, or better stated, we define ourselves by what we do.  It shapes how we see ourselves and how we project ourselves to others we meet.  People don’t say I fix cars or I bake cookies, or I cut grass.  They say what they are.

The problem is that when our job disappears because we are fired, or furloughed or as in the case of the COVID19 pandemic, the government shuts it down and we can no longer have that job and don’t know if we ever will again, we lose our identity.  We no longer know who we are.  We lose our self-esteem, we stop being us and the fallout from that loss of identity is devastating.  It initiates the most basic of survival mechanisms, fight/flight/freeze.  It creates stress, fear and anxiety that cannot be resolved by the means that we have used and learned from our prior experience.  The social isolation, the constant bombardment of negative information and reports of higher death tolls places stressors on us that weaken us physically, spiritually and emotionally.  I recently wrote about that dynamic and how we as a country, perhaps even as a world community, are witnessing the greatest mass hypnosis of all time (https://www.hypnomarc.com/2020/04/08/we-are-witnessing-the-greatest-mass-hypnosis-of-all-time/).  The response I got from that article continues to validate my observations and concerns that the end result of this coronavirus pandemic has forever reshaped our society and in many instances, not for the better.

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This past weekend (April 12, 2020) Chris Bryant (@chrismbryant) wrote an opinion piece for Bloomberg that appeared in the Star Ledger, made some points that those of us in the entertainment and gig industry better sit up and take notice of.  Bryant writes: “…Instead of visiting far-flung places and seeking out mass entertainment, I’m sure there will be a bias toward more modest, local activities.”  He goes on to opine: “ Looming above all of this is the damage that the lockdowns are inflicting on people’s incomes.  The longer the economic shutdown lasts, the more reluctant the world’s consumers will be to spend, period.”   The hospitality industries- travel and leisure, cruise lines, hotels and casinos are being reshaped as this continues.  Bryant speaks of the changes he sees already happening in fitness and education industries as well as pointing out there will be new opportunities for those who have a vision to look outside the box. (My words, not his.)

In his closing statement, Bryant makes the following statement: Faced with uncertainty or disaster, humans respond by trying to strengthen their communities.”  While that is a statement which many may agree with, I believe there is a strong caveat that needs to be added.  Humans can only respond with efforts to strengthen their own communities when they are not facing the fundamental imperative of survival.  And as Bryant states, the longer it lasts the more reluctant we become.  The constant barrage of negativity from the media, the bombardment of the death toll, the inability of state governments to respond to jobless claims and the heavy burdens the restrictions place in the “name of the public good” and to break the back of the virus, are just burying the survivors.

We are, as humans, hardwired to seek connection.  Study after study shows that people, especially, infants fail to thrive when they are deprived of human touch.  Social touch is a powerful force in human development, shaping social reward, attachment, cognitive, communication, and emotional regulation from infancy and throughout life[i].  Yet, the social isolation, imposed loss of identity through job loss, unrelenting stress triggers, and continual uncertainty by politicians and fear mongers who continually move the “cheese” as we run through the maze, just exacerbates the deleterious effects on each of us.

As a clinical and stage hypnotist and motivational speaker,  I make my living by changing peoples’ focus.  Sometimes I am helping them move past a debilitating trauma, other times helping them to forget the pressures of life as they immerse themselves in the insanity of a comedy hypnosis show, but in all cases, what I am doing is simply changing their present focus.  I am taking them out of their “head” and moving them into a present moment or experience.  David Snyder (@davidsnyder) a respected authority on Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) defines hypnosis as moving from one state of mind to another with a change of absorption and focus.  The more absorbed you are, the more focused you are, the deeper the trance you are in.

And it is this deep trance that has been created by the constant beat of the drums, the actions of the media and politicians, to keep us hypnotized so that we cannot take those important steps of clearing the fog from our minds and begin the process of rebuilding our lives, our community and nation.  I saw a meme recently that spoke more truth that most are oblivious to – “Quarantine is when you restrict the movement of sick people … Tyranny is when you restrict the movement of healthy people.”  

Sadly, people will die from this virus.  How many more are going to die or be destroyed by the trauma, isolation, stress and anxiety that is unrelentingly heaped upon them as this continues without end?  How many will die from alcoholism or drug abuse or depression and suicide brought on by the impact of hastily imposed actions in what was originally an honest effort to protect society?  This is not about right or left, about Democrat or Republican.  No, it is far more important than that.  It is a recognition that in order to recover, we must wake up now and be able to answer the fundamental question that I asked at the beginning of this article  WHO ARE YOU?

If you would like to know what it would be like to move past the stress, anxiety or fear and can imagine what it would like to live in the present and learn more about how I can help you move past these feelings, I invite you to reach out to me and see how hypnosis can help you or to schedule an interview by using the link below.   It is time to start moving forward and rebuilding our lives … Isn’t It?

Hey Marc - Let's Talk

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Hypnotist, Author & Motivational Speaker, Marc Marshall

Marc Marshall is a certified clinical and stage hypnotist, medical hypnotist and certified mind-body specialist, author and motivational speaker at the New Jersey Hypnosis Center in Summit NJ.  He specializes in dealing with trauma, sexual trauma, pain, medical hypnosis and works with clients to empower and teach them how to improve their lives through hypnosis and mindfulness practice.  For more information or to schedule an appointment or interview, email info@hypnomarc.com or visit his website – www.hypnomarc.com

[i] Social touch and human development

Carissa J.Cascioac DavidMooreb FrancisMcGlonebd

https://doi.org/10.1016/j.dcn.2018.04.009

#hypnotherapy, @chrismbryant, @davidsnyder, #covid19, #Coronavirus, #pandemic, #anxiety, #NLP, #hypnosis, #marcmarshall, #quarantine, #hypnotherapy, #democrat, #republican, @govmurphy, @jonbramnick, @ReopenNJ,@tomkean, @njdotcom, #americaworkstogether, #americastrong, #godblessamerica, @realdonaldtrump, @stevehiltonx, @lauraingraham, @seanhannity, @judgejeanine, @jessiebwatters, #covid19, #coronavirus, #hypnosis, #masshypnosis, #fear, #stress, #anxiety, #obesity, #marcmarshall, #newjerseyhypnosis, #newjerseyhypnosiscenter, #njhypnosis, #hypnomarc, #health, #stress, #hypnotherapy, #hypnotize, #covid19hypnosis

Interesting

We Are Witnessing The Greatest Mass Hypnosis Of All Time

Yes! You read that right – We are witnessing the greatest mass hypnosis of all time.   Three weeks ago, I released a video on my vlog channel, Hypnosis Hangout, where I talked about the end of the world as we know it.  That message was specifically directed at hypnotists as a wake-up call to start making changes to the way they do both stage and clinical hypnosis.  What I missed at the time of that video were the signs of an event that even the best hypnotists in the world didn’t even see and are still missing.

In hypnosis, we know that the state of trance hypnosis is achieved in only one of two ways; either overload of the central nervous system, or fatigue of the nervous system.  The current Covid19 crisis has created both of these conditions and as a result, it has caused the most suggestible state that a person could ever be in.  Whether by design or accident, the result is the same, it is the transformation by the formation of this trance, that our futures are being shaped and we don’t see it or are so tranced out that we don’t care.

Please understand that I am not talking about conspiracy, although there will be many others that do.  I am simply observing a phenomenon that I see every day in my work as a clinical hypnotist to help people change behaviors or my work on stage entertaining people by having them engage in a host of zany and fun skits.  They hear what I am saying, they understand they are doing the things I ask and willingly do so.  In both those situations, I am using my skills to bypass what is known as the critical faculty of the conscious or rational mind and move right to the subconscious mind.  It is the subconscious mind that truly controls all of our behaviors and since this is now open to the continued suggestions by the constant messaging, people are being forever changed.

Let me pull back the curtain a bit on how this process works and show you what has happened and is continuing to happen in this current emergency.  Many of you have witnessed what hypnotists call an instant or shock induction.  These are the dramatic inductions that many stage and street hypnotists use to induce a trance state (hypnosis) in their volunteers.  It literally takes just a few seconds for this to happen.  What the hypnotist typically does is cause a firing of that portion of the brain known as the amygdala.  We literally hijack the amygdala which is responsible for the “fight/flight/freeze” mechanism of our bodies.  It is in this split second of time, that the subconscious mind is looking for a program that will provide an appropriate response.   Nancy Moyer, MD., describes it as “When stress makes you feel strong anger, aggression, or fear, the fight-or-flight response is activated. … It happens when a situation causes your amygdala to hijack control of your response to stress. The amygdala disables the frontal lobes and activates the fight-or-flight response.[i]”  It is this most basic of instinctual responses that is responsible for our survival as a species.  It is caused by the release of cortisol, a powerful stress hormone.

There are several extremely critical parts of this phenomena of amygdala hijack that are the essence of what I am seeing and which concerns me.  As stated above, the amygdala disables the frontal lobe of our brains.  The frontal lobe is the part of the brain that controls important cognitive skills in humans, such as emotional expression, problem solving, memory, language, judgment, and sexual behaviors. It is, in essence, the “control panel” of our personality and our ability to communicate.[ii]   We lose our ability to make rational judgements, our stress increases and dramatic physical changes take place in our bodies. Most importantly, we become and remain highly suggestible in this highly aroused state.  Our subconscious minds are seeking to find that “program” that will free us from this threat and we take that cue from the perceived leaders.

Language matters and the language of this coronavirus epidemic, is truly concerning.  It is concerning not just because of  the fear and uncertainty that it is stoking, but the amazing subtleties of language that are being introduced and nuanced in the process.  We have heard the experts and the media speak of concepts of herd immunity and social distancing.  The unspoken message is striking here!  The masses are no more than a herd that can be shepherded into controlled behaviors.  We have willingly and without question given up fundamental rights and liberties.  We are told that we need to do this for the protection of the community until we develop a herd immunity.  And since our frontal lobe judgement has been shut down by the stress and trance state we are in, people are generally unable to access their problem solving abilities.  And people take the solutions they are given by the “experts” because they are paralyzed by uncertainty.  They are, in every sense frozen.

The rapid spread of this pandemic, was the “shock” induction into this hypnotic state.  The continued uncertainty. the loss of lives, jobs, forced isolation, fear created by the infection numbers and death count is creating a type of fractionation, what hypnotists commonly refer to as a deepening of the hypnotic state through continual wakening and reinduction of trance.  We are being fatigued by the numbness of isolation, the restriction of the very activities that would counteract the harmful physical effects of constant stress and reduce the cortisol loads in our bodies.  People can no longer access walking and running parks because state, county and local municipalities have closed them.  These are the very activities that physicians know reduce stress, increase immune responses and most importantly improve our overall ability to physically, emotionally and spiritually deal with the pandemic.

Our children are isolated, afraid and stressed. They will carry the scars of this experience for the rest of their lives. Their very sense of safety and security has been shaken.  It is now more important than ever that we reduce the stress and fear. Medical experts speak to us about the increased risk factors that place those infected with Covid19 at greatest jeopardy.  These factors include, high blood pressure, diabetes, and obesity.  These are the very things that result from high cortisol levels.  High cortisol is also responsible for increased anxiety, increased irritability, rapid weight gain and muscle weakness.  These are all conditions that can be counteracted by increased activity and responsible use of our open spaces.

As a clinical hypnotist, my job is to help people find a path to improve their lives and resolve the traumas that have crippled many of them.  I will continue to help them deal with pain, both physical and emotional.  I continue to help them find those resource states that will empower them to be an even better version of themselves.  And while this truly may be the end of the world as we know it,  I sit here today fully confident that I will continue to help people be better.  I know, without any doubt, I will continue to help people to love and laugh again,  and to deal with the challenges of this pandemic.

Every hypnotist knows these words are true:  “What the Mind Conceives, the Body Achieves.”  I believe that we have a unique opportunity to be an even better version of ourselves.  I believe that when we all awaken from this imposed state of hypnosis, that we will do so with a new vision, a new resolve and a new understanding of how amazing we can be.  1! 2! 3! WIDE AWAKE!

 

Hypnotist, Author and Motivational Speaker

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Marc Marshall is a certified clinical and stage hypnotist, medical hypnotist and certified mind-body specialist, author and motivational speaker at the New Jersey Hypnosis Center in Summit NJ.  He specializes in dealing with trauma, sexual trauma, pain, medical hypnosis and works with clients to empower and teach them how to improve their lives through hypnosis and mindfulness practice.  For more information or to schedule an appointment or interview, email info@hypnomarc.com or visit his website – www.hypnomarc.com

#covid19, #coronavirus, #hypnosis, #masshypnosis, #fear, #stress, #anxiety, #obesity, #marcmarshall, #newjerseyhypnosis, #newjerseyhypnosiscenter, #njhypnosis, #hypnomarc, #health, #stress, #hypnotherapy, #hypnotize, #covid19hypnosis, #AmericaWorksTogether, #stayhome @tuckercarlson @foxnews @seanhannity @lauraingraham @cnn #drfauci

[i] Amygdala Hijack: What It Is, Why It Happens & How to Make … (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.healthline.com/health/stress/amygdala-hijack.

[ii] Frontal Lobe Anatomy & Pictures | Healthline. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.healthline.com/human-body-maps/frontal-lobe.