Experts Discover Potentially Dangerous Problem Caused by Covid-19

Posted Posted in Interesting, You Can Fix That

 

Pictures of Covid19 cells
Electron micrographs of isolated 2019-nCoV particles (left), and in cells from human airways (right), marked with arrows.
THE NEW ENGLAND JOURNAL OF MEDICINE

Coronavirus is Killing Your Libido

A couple of weeks into the Coronavirus pandemic, I began to get calls from old and new clients with what was an expected problem. The stress, anxiety and uncertainty surrounding the disease and the loss of millions of jobs, stress of standing in lines and finding empty shelves where there was once essential items, and the orders to stay away from people and stay in your homes was really weighing on us.  Clients were having difficulty sleeping, they were overeating, and this forced vacation from school and work was quickly becoming old.

The experts were telling us to wash our hands, social distance ourselves, and to the extent possible maintain a sense of normalcy. Well, this new normal was clearly changing the way we interact with our spouses and partners. In our pre-pandemic lives, couples/partners would go about their typical routines of being out of the home and away from each other for eight to ten hours a day. Perhaps you would return and have a date night, or share dinner and recount your day, or perhaps you would share a 2 people kissing in streetconversation you had with a friend or colleague about something interesting. There would be a reconnecting between you and your partner. However, we now find ourselves looking for ways to create our own space within the confinement of our homes.

Slowly, and almost imperceptibly, many people began to feel closed in;  closed in by the space; closed in by the situation; closed in by their partner. And the impact of this constant bombardment of stress combined with the inability to find space is having its toll on how people feel.

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As I began to search more deeply into what they were saying and not saying, I was hearing things that began to raise red flags. I found that I was hearing a common theme starting to surface. Now before I get into what I was hearing, I want to share something that I also was seeing.

In an interesting marketing twist, the online porn sites such as PornHub and YouPorn began to advertise free service to help people through the stress of the pandemic. And while toilet paper was becoming a scarce resource, online retailers are seeing a serious surge in the sale sex toys. And these toys are not just for those who are isolated due to social distancing. No,  let’s put it on the line, sex feels good and it breaks up the boredom and routine. I will come back to the benefits in a bit. For now, let me leave that hanging there.

The red flags that my clients talked about outwardly dealt with their sleeplessness, anxiety, and fear. As we spoke more, they also shared that they were noticing that they weren’t feeling “IT”. They were feeling that their drive was on life-support. And when questioned further, both the men and women who were reaching out to me shared that they would find some personal space to slip away and masturbate. This too makes sense since it is “me time”, feels good, and relieves the boredom

Now, I am sure that like me, none of this is news or a surprise. Perhaps you find that I could well be describing the situation you are finding yourself in at the present. We know that libido is often the first victim of stress. The thing is that most people mistakenly equate libido to sex drive when it is truly much more than that. One of the most highly respected in the area of helping people overcome sexual issues through hypnosis is a woman in the U.K., Kaz Riley. Riley who is one of the most sought-after speakers and trainers in the world of hypnosis and the founder of Sexual Freedom Hypnosis , teaches therapists and clinicians how to improve the psycho-sexual functioning of consenting adults. Kaz’s definition of libido is far more comprehensive than simply sex-drive. According to Kaz, “ libido is a desire to connect. It is a sensual feeling and a desire to move forward. It is not just about having sex.”    This “life-force” as Riley calls it, is a primary driver that is there to help us succeed and achieve and to feel good.

The issue at hand (no pun intended), is that stress and anxiety become a loop which feed on themselves and create disruptions in our desire to share intimacy. It is well known that humans thrive with touch. For too many people who are shut-in away from others, they are failing to thrive. In fact, they are actually unintentionally harming themselves because they cannot engage in their normal routines of exercising, grooming and gaining the energy that we get from connecting with others and by overeating or eating the wrong foods, and masturbating to attempt to make themselves feel better.  I wrote the following in an earlier blog article: “We are, as humans, hardwired to seek connection. Study after study shows that people, especially, infants fail to thrive when they are deprived of human touch. Social touch is a powerful force in human development, shaping social reward, attachment, cognitive, communication, and emotional regulation from infancy and throughout life[i]. Yet, the social isolation, imposed loss of identity through job loss, unrelenting stress triggers, and continual uncertainty by politicians and fear mongers who continually move the “cheese” as we run through the maze, just exacerbates the deleterious effects on each of us.”

The death of our libido’s is serious. It is not just the loss of our sex drive; it is the loss of our feeling of intimacy and the long-term damage it is doing to us. And it isn’t going to be fixed with a little blue pill, or a new toy, or another video. No, right now, the only way that you are going to juice up your libido is by following these really important steps. Otherwise, you very well may find that it too is one of the casualties of the pandemic.

MOUTH TO MOUTH FOR YOUR LIBIDO

Reviving your drooping libido is going to take some elbow grease. You are going to have to take matters into your hands and really start a regimen of self-care. Start by losing the porn. PLEASE! I am not against porn. In fact, porn can be a great tool for spicing things up, if you remember that it is not real. I am, however, against using porn, or drugs or alcohol or food as an island of refuge from your pain, fear, and anxiety. That pain, fear, and anxiety that many are feeling is one of the biggest things you are facing. If you are struggling with the impact that any of these are having on your life, then reach out to me and see how hypnosis can help you break the cycle.

So, the first step to self-care is learning to become mindful. It means getting back to eating right, drinking plenty of water, taking time to practice mindfulness or other meditation. Mindfulness practice is not just about sitting quietly and clearing one’s mind. It is about learning to be present and focused in this moment. You can practice mindfulness when you are outside, socially distant from others, and walking. And as you walk mindfully, things begin to change. Perhaps, you become aware of the absence of airplane or car noises now. Maybe, you begin to notice the wonderful smells around and the colors of nature. I am amazed at how many people who tell me that they discover things that they have passed hundreds of times once they begin to do things mindfully.

One of the most amazing gifts of mindfulness is learning to eat mindfully. How much of the time do you eat a meal and before you know it, it is gone, and you have no idea what it tasted like. What if, you stopped and looked at your food? What if you smelled the smells and savored the tastes? What if instead of the usual bedroom routine of lips, t*ts and below the hips, you and your partner sensuously shared a piece of fruit or a glass of wine with the only goal being that of being able to experience this moment with them.  Imagine how much better you and your partner’s experience will be when you are both present and focused on each other.

Libido is about the journey, not the destination. Instead of becoming another victim of this pandemic, you have the most unique opportunity to spend time and put real effort into your relationship. It is not about achieving orgasm, though they feel great and release a host of endorphins and feel good hormones. Libido is far more than that. Now, maybe more than ever before, we need purposeful, loving, connection. The connection that comes from long hugs or sitting close to each other looking deeply into the windows of their being or with your hand on their hearts synchronizing your breathing and heartbeat. Now, more than ever before, we need to connect by shutting out the world, the noise and insanity, and allow the energy that attracted us to that other person to flow. And when you do that, when you mindfully engage in connecting and meet their needs, you will be amazed at how the desire to move forward and again be real with each other will break through.

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[i] Social touch and human development

Carissa J.Cascioac DavidMooreb FrancisMcGlonebd

https://doi.org/10.1016/j.dcn.2018.04.009

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Hypnotist, Author & Motivational Speaker, Marc Marshall

Marc Marshall is a certified clinical and stage hypnotist, medical hypnotist and certified mind-body specialist, author and motivational speaker at the New Jersey Hypnosis Center in Summit NJ.  He specializes in dealing with trauma, sexual trauma, pain, medical hypnosis and works with clients to empower and teach them how to improve their lives through hypnosis and mindfulness practice.  For more information or to schedule an appointment or interview, email info@hypnomarc.com or visit his website – www.hypnomarc.com

#hypnotherapy, @kazriley, @sexualfreedomhypnosis, #covid19, #Coronavirus, #pandemic, #anxiety, #NLP, #hypnosis, #marcmarshall, #quarantine, #hypnotherapy, #covid19, #coronavirus, #hypnosis, #masshypnosis, #fear, #stress, #anxiety, #obesity, #marcmarshall, #newjerseyhypnosis, #newjerseyhypnosiscenter, #njhypnosis, #hypnomarc, #health, #stress, #hypnotherapy, #hypnotize, #covid19hypnosis, #erotichypnosis, #sexualdysfunction, #libidio, #coupleshypnosis, #lossofsexdrive #relationships, newjerseyhypnosiscenter, #mindfulness, #summitnj, #westfieldnj, #sexpositive, #nofear, #sextherapy, #anorgasmia, #ed, #prematureejaculation, #vaginisumus, #performance, #performanceanxiety, #sex, #pleasure, #arousal, #porn, #pornaddiction, #masturbation #youporn, #pornhub, #sextoys #huffpo #refinery29 #buzzfeed #drresa #cosmo, #covid19update, #important covid19 information

Stop with the New Year’s Resolutions! They DON’T WORK!

Posted Posted in Interesting, You Can Fix That

They DON’T WORK!
Photo by freestock.org by Pexels

 

Stop with the New Year’s Resolutions! 

They DON’T WORK!

The new year is here and like last year, and the year before and the year before that, you’ve decided it is time to take stock of your life.  So, let me guess, you’re being bombarded online, on TV, on radio, your family, your doctor… EVERYWHERE, with ads to change your life; to find love; to join this gym, that weight loss program, stop smoking programs, stopping using substances or gambling or internet addiction .  Well guess what?  IT’S A  SCAM!  IT’S A FRAUD!  It doesn’t work and it never will.  Sure, you may change for a short time, but it won’t last.  All you will have done is thrown away more money on band-aid fixes and reinforced that voice in your head that has been telling you for years it wouldn’t work.  YES… another failure and that voice is right, again!

By now, you are saying to yourself… “This guy’s a real downer!”  I’m psyched up to take charge of my life and make a change and here is some clown telling me it is never going to work.  THAT’S RIGHT- IT WON’T!  Because if it did, you never would be in this position.  This is nothing more than doing the same thing over and expecting a different result.  The weight loss industry with all their diet programs, gyms with membership come-ons and up-sell programs, all these programs know this one fact to be true;  your conscious mind, that rational part of your brain that responds to the slick ads is incapable of sustained change.  That means they can simply rinse and repeat their ads, parade out “happy” people and know how you, the vulnerable audience is going to flock to their “new and improved” program.

ARE YOU DOOMED TO LIVING AN UNHAPPY EXISTENCE?

As you guessed, that’s the wrong question.  The real question begins with “WHAT’S THE PROBLEM?”   Seriously,  it comes down to simply that.  More importantly it is a two part question – “What’s the problem; “How do you KNOW?”   You see, my experience from years as a clinical hypnotist has taught me that the “PROBLEM”  is never “THE PROBLEM”.   You or your friends, family, therapist or doctor have put this label on a situation, on an experience,  that is driving your unhealthy, unwanted behaviors and you continue to play that script over and over.   Each time you replay that failed program in your mind or life, you are not only strengthening the negative behaviors, but you are also changing them and your brain.

The issue comes down to breaking the bonds that have ensnared you, probably for a good part of your life.  Things like… “I’ve always been overweight .  Growing up my family was heavy.  That’s just who I am! “  or “I can’t focus, I have ADD/ADHD” or “I always windup with losers and getting hurt.” aren’t set in stone.  Just because that is the way it has been, does it mean that is the way it will always be?  That is solely up to you.  You are the only one who can make that choice.  You are the only one who can make this change.  Band-aids don’t fix it!  Living in the past  or worrying about the future can’t change it.  Change only happens when you are sick and tired of being sick and tired.

A large number of clients who come to see me for change work, begin by rehashing their stories of failures and pain.  They do this because they have been trained by therapists to relive and retell their “stories.”  They mistakenly believe that the answer lies in some mistake they made in the past.   The problem is that this approach only continues to reinforce the dysfunction and fire up neural pathways that continue to feed the issue and increase the negative states of being.  This is why I too often hear new clients telling me what they don’t want.  They are focused on the negative behavior, the substance abuse, the sexual trauma, the fear, the pain, the weight and not on what they want to feel like and be.

SO HOW DO YOU WANT IT TO BE?

The subconscious mind is really amazing in its ability to make rapid and dramatic changes.  Being that the subconscious mind is the feeling, non-rational mind  that operates without you having to think about it.  Being that the subconscious mind is literal, it is not being bound by logic.  Its purpose is to protect us and keep us safe.   Every action has a thought associated with it.  Most of the time, we are unaware of the thought.  Since behavior is controlled at the cellular level, it becomes important to change the emotional attachment that the subconscious mind holds to the behavior we are looking to change.

The challenge then becomes separating the intention from the behavior. The intention is what our subconscious mind is seeking to protect us from.  It is the underlying goal of the behavior.  Lasting change is dependent upon getting to a place of accepting the power of the resource state that you have inside of that unwanted behavior. Then reframing and amplifying it to a new and powerful resource state.  When this is done, the negative emotions that have previously been associated with the behavior are replaced with new neural pathways, positive feelings and a release.

Since imagination is more powerful then knowledge, just imagine what it would be like to be different.  Imagine being present and acting, rather than reacting to situations.  What would that feel like?  And as you picture your new and improved self, you are already beginning to make that lasting change permanent.  And that feels good.

SO WHAT’S DIFFERENT, NOW?

In part, it is the realization that what happened, happened.  You are not the same person that experienced that experience which has been driving those unwanted, unnecessary behaviors.  You did the best you could with the tools that you had at the time.  Those unnecessary and unwanted behaviors have been responsible for pain, both emotional and physical.  The false memories have been keeping you stuck and unhappy. But that is how it was.  Now, you have a chance to do something different.  You have a chance to take all the resources from all your experiences and power them up so they serve to move you forward and finally attain your goals of being a better, healthier and happier you.

The repeated failures to make change were the result of the conflicts between your conscious and subconscious mind.  And since it is impossible to hold conflicting ideas at the same time, there must be a winner and loser in our behaviors.  The winner will always be the subconscious mind.  As a result, it is necessary to bring our two minds into agreement.  Once you have eliminated the conflict between the conscious and subconscious minds you are able to eat mindfully, sleep better, love yourself, be more active and present.  These are all benefits that come once you are living in a new mindset.

WHAT IS THAT NOT?

This is a strange question.  It is not a question that you are going to answer in that gym or therapy session or weight loss program without working through the “problem” state. The answers come when you step outside of the box of usual and move to being ready to accept the change.  And even more interesting, is the fact that the change you seek can take place in a single hypnotherapy session.  Unlike traditional therapies that focus on the “cause” or “problem” or negative behaviors.  Hypnosis restructures the associated emotions and thinking that has been hardwired and amplified by the “stinking thinking.” If trauma takes place in an instant, why should anyone believe that change should take months or years?

What is really interesting is that because you have read down to this point of the article, you know that change has already begun.  You now have knowledge that you didn’t have just a few minutes ago and that is different. So knowing what you know now, you are asking yourself “Where do I go now?” 

You already know that everything you need to change already exists inside of you.  And knowing that, you also know that you are looking for someone who understands that you can love who you were by loving who you can become.  Becoming more resourceful is powerful.  Hypnosis is the most powerful path forward.  So, STOP WITH THE NEW YEAR”S RESOLUTIONS and take the action right now to respect yourself, love yourself and really pay attention to your needs.

SO, WHAT’S THE PROBLEM?

Is it that you want to reach out to me but don’t know how much more you want?   Or is it that you want more in your life but are not sure how to get it?  Does it really matter if you change now or in a couple of days from now, knowing that you are going to change.  And isn’t it exciting to know that you are finding that all those new and powerful resources that change you will make you even more amazing.

I guess it comes down to a simple thought, creating an even easier action to reach out and just ask me when that change can happen for you.  And because you want to know all of that I want to make it as easy as I can for you to get your answer, now.  Just click or tap this link and you too can decide the best day to change your life with hypnosis and without question.  Get Started NOW - Click or Tap




Marc Marshall, CPH, CHMI, MBIS

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Marc Marshall is a certified hypnotist, medical hypnotist and certified mind-body specialist, author and motivational speaker with offices in Summit NJ and Shaftsbury Vt.  He specializes in dealing with trauma, sexual trauma, pain and works with clients to empower and teach them how to improve their lives through hypnosis and mindfulness practice.  For more information or to schedule an appointment or interview, email info@hypnomarc.com or visit his website – www.hypnomarc.com

Change 7 Things Torturing Millennial Women…

Posted Posted in Interesting, You Can Fix That

Change 7  Things Torturing Millennial Women Before it Destroys You!


WOW! The number of millennial and Gen-X women who are calling me to help them deal with relationship issues has really skyrocketed in the past few months.  If you find yourself not enjoying relationships, just hooking up because it is easier than dealing with the challenges, or, you find yourself trapped in toxic relationships, then my hypnosis sessions are for you.  Watch this video and then download my free report to learn more.

Change 7 Things Torturing Millenial Women – by Marc Marshall, CH CHMI

Special Report – Change 7 Things Torturing Millennial Women Before it Destroys You